Could we please stop hating the haters?
How I despise country music! Is anything more annoying than a smarmy Stetson-wearing “hunk” wailing about turning to drink because his woman stole his unemployment check and his dog and ran off with his best friend? I’ll never understand how the people who produce that garbage can hold their heads up. And don’t even get me started on the listeners. From what I can tell, the typical country music fan has the brains of a sweet potato.
Before we go any further, I’m just kidding, okay? But just for a moment, let’s imagine that everyone reading this is a die-hard country music fan. Now–
Did my opening paragraph make you feel ashamed of your listening habits? Will it discourage you from buying Brad Paisley’s latest CD? Will it make you reconsider your dream of taking your songs to Nashville and getting them heard? And finally, do you believe that my foolish, mean-spirited words will have even the tiniest impact on the country music industry or its, uh, listenership?
I’m guessing most of you answered each of those questions in the negative. So why do we get so upset when people ridicule the romance industry? When they insist that any fool could write one of those “trashy little romance novels”? When they imply that the typical romance reader is a bored and boring individual of sub-par intelligence who has checked out of the real world because she can’t get a good man to love her?
Last week an author writing in another genre singled out my romance publisher’s guidelines for some heavy ridicule. His message was clear: Our books are shallow, whereas his books are deep. We have sold out, while he is willing to fight to the death for Realism and Integrity in Fiction.
Quite a few of my author friends were deeply offended and did their best to set the guy straight. Yes, his rant was a tad irksome, but he was expressing his own opinions on his own blog, and isn’t that what blogs are for? One of the things I hate about the internet is the way people leap into arguments on blogs they have never read before, leaving huffy comments because their friends have stirred them up and encouraged them to go over there and give that jerk a piece of their minds.
I cringe when I see romance readers piling on, coming from every corner of the internet to punish the hapless bloggers our friends have taken exception to. Is our self-respect so fragile that we must shore it up by slapping down everyone who ventures to express an unflattering opinion about our favorite genre of fiction?
There are times and places where a few well-chosen words can help build respect for the romance industry and its various subgenres. But I don’t think its wise for us to troop over to blogs we don’t ordinarily read and “tell off” bloggers who are complete strangers to us. When we rush into battle every single time somebody maligns the books we love, we risk appearing insecure and pathetic. And consider this: if a blogger really is mean spirited, she’ll “win” by making us angry. She’ll sit back and laugh at us all the more once she knows she’s controlling our emotions.
I’d just like for all of us to display a little more confidence, that’s all. We who read and write romance have no need to defend our choice. We don’t have to fight for and earn the right to hold our heads up. Tell a country music fan that you detest country music and she’ll probably just shrug and say, “Well, I love it.”
Maybe we romance lovers ought to do the same.
Copyright
Daily Love
Hi Ocean Dreamers, I had a really bad day today and got into an argument with my best friend {the last time we argued this badly was in college}, received a horrible grade on a test, and tried with all of my might to get out of this funk but it just didn’t work until now.
Lets just say I am tired of being judged. I know that everyone makes mistakes and end of the day I think loving someone is better than pushing them away. If you and I have the ability and a command from God to love others, but instead of doing that, we judge and criticize them, we have taken the hold the thing {love} and cast it aside. We all make mistakes. We all have weaknesses. We are not to be hard-hearted and have a critical spirit toward each other, but instead to forgive one another and to show show mercy and love. {some of this is reworded by me from the novel Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer}
All is better with my best friend and every day I feel like I am learning the true meaning of love and being reminded to love and not to judge. Loving is my policy, no matter what.
I signed up on this site for some Daily Love, you should too if you need the boost! I love this poem, it really put everything into perspective for me.
- Follow them on Twitter! http://www.Twitter.com/TheDailyLove
- Check out their beta site! http://www.TheDailyLove.com
What is this… Love?
By Mastin Kipp
Love allows
Love obeys
Love forgives
Love stays
Love endures
Love see’s through
All your fears
To the real you
Love stands true
Love stays firm
Love’s forever
It’s cheek it turns
Love holds no grudge’s
Love fights no wars
Love has no boundries
Love is what you’re looking for
Love’s not a game
But a patience hand
Love begins
Where division ends
Love has no future
It has no past
Love’s forever
And wears no mask
Love faces your fears
Love stays the course
Love doesn’t run away
Or rules by force
Love allows
Love observes
Love casts no judgement
And never has the last word
Love is flowing
And eternal still
Love says yes!
To no’s cold chill
Love does nothing
But leaves nothing undone
When your fear fades away
Love is what you’ll become
So let love in
In all it’s disguises
You never know what pleasures lay
In all of love’s surprises!
Love has no ego
No point to prove
And the best part about love
Is that it’s always within yourself
So, love, you can never lose
P.S. Thanks for all of your kind comments on my previous post, I will be making my rounds to all of your blogs soon. Thanks for all of your loving hearts.
XOXO,
*all photos are from weheartit.com!
Episode 25 – Do You Know The Best Way To Heal A Toxic Relationship?
Are you involved in a toxic relationship? Find out when you take a simple Love Test. Learn the best new tool to repair and rebuild your romantic relationship now.
Back to Basics
These last few month’s I’ve been busy working on some projects. It’s fun delving into world and new characters. Getting to know all about them and bring them to life. When I write that first word I get a thrill.
As the words unfold I get even more excited. Writing a book is like a painting to me. First I study the page. Decide how to lay my colors for the best picture. Each piece has to work with each other to create something great.
Lately I’ve had this story I’m working on. It is a story that came out of the blue so I didn’t sit down and plan anything. Just sat down and wrote. As I wrote the plot became more and more intricate. I like when it get intricate and complicated it keep me on my toes. So this story is flowing so well that I get up each day and can’t wait until I have a moment to write it. Usually I don’t go back and read a story over until I am done but I needed to make sure a thread I had written was correct so I went back and re-read the part. Before I knew it I was caught up in the story. LOL. I realized the story so far was real good.
Hmmm…this is a back to basics way for me. Let the thoughts flow and go as they will. My writing process has changed as I write each story and I love moving with it.
Next up there is a dream that keeps bugging me. I think it is calling out for a story.
Have a great weekend.
McKenna Jeffries
http://www.mckennajeffries.com
…. sensual, edgy, unexpected
Blog: http://www.mckennajeffries.com/blog
Chat Group: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/McKennaJeffriesList
Free Reads Site: http:/ /www.satinnotes.com/
Conquering Jazz – What’s a woman to do when she unwittingly makes a tantalizing proposition to her best friend?
Be brazen, bold and set some ground rules.Her offer. One night of carnal bliss. No emotion
allowed.
His counter offer. A continued affair to fulfill all their sexual cravings.
His hidden agenda. Conquer to make sure their affair never ends.
Buy here at Liquid Silver Book.
Dating Q & A – When Is A Player Free To Meet Your Best Match?
Dating Question:
In 5 years of being single since my divorce, I’ve enjoyed a string of romances. My latest encounter just got racheted up a level, yet it’s still early. I’m used to great startups and bad breakups, but I may want to break that cycle. Not because of the woman I’m dating.
I just met a woman on a dating site, and I can’t get her off of my mind. We’ve written and talked on the phone. We each have creative careers and common experience in raising our children as a single parent. We like each other and want to meet in person.
When I offered to fly to meet her, I made the mistake of telling her I was seeing someone else.
Now she won’t meet me until I’m single and available. Isn’t that unrealistic and overly demanding? I’d normally disconnect, but she just might be my best match. She’ll get snapped up fast. Got any dating advice for me?
Conflicted in Connecticut
Dating Answer:
You are conflicted because you’re intrigued by two women at once. But you’re already involved with one. And you may have met the one you don’t want to lose.
Is it unrealistic to request that you are single and emotionally available before you meet a potential match?
Absolutely not. Distracted focus destroys possibilities in any relationship. So does conflicted dating goals.
If you’re dating to meet your best match, you won’t waste your time meeting singles who enjoy a string of “encounters.” You sort through these “Players” and meet singles who share your dating goals.
If you want to meet this new woman, are you willing to free yourself from your current “encounter”?
If you’re not ready or willing to do this, then you aren’t free to meet your best match.
How would you feel if you missed your chance to meet?
Trust your feelings and choose wisely.
Let me know what you decide.
For our single readers who are seeking your best match, I invite you to enjoy a free months membership in the Singles Club in Tribe Of Blondes.
Not a hair color, it’s a resilient optimism that unites us and fuels our adventures.
No more blind dates, since you meet our savvy Tribe Of Singles in video chats, special events, and singles travel for every budget.
Claim your singles free months membership now.
Simply click on SINGLES CLUB in the menu bar, and sign up. Enjoy!
Dedicated to your dating and relationship happiness,
Hadley Finch
Love Test For Women Who Date – Are You Too Nice To Excite A Man?
Do men often see you as a friend instead of a serious girlfriend? Ever wonder if you’re too nice to hold a man’s passionate interest?
Find out if you have the right qualities to sustain excitement in a relationship when you take this Love Test. And get 7 tips to shift your outlook and actions and spark romantic excitement that lasts.
Love Test For Women Who Date:
1 A. Are you willing to sacrifice your needs for a man’s needs?
B. Or are you a woman who makes your needs and well being a top priority?
2 A. Do you try to be sexy in your choice of dating clothes and conversation?
B. Or is your sexual energy a natural part of your life force so you don’t need to think about it?
3 A. Do you frequently have to ask dates to treat you with respect and affection?
B. Or do you naturally receive respect and affection from dates because that’s how you feel about you?
4 A. Do you constantly offer advice, repeat requests and feel ignored and drained?
B. Or do you feel energized by an equal give and take in interactions that keep a relationship exciting?
5 A. Do you cancel your original plans if a great guy calls you for a last-minute date?
B. Or do you honor engagements and gradually make room in your full life for a new relationship?
6 A. Do you crave praise and seek instant chemistry and commitment?
B. Or are you happy with yourself and your life, with or without a man in it?
7 A. Are you the one who does most of the chasing and calling in a dating relationship?
B. Or are you being pursued by potential matches and being selective in choosing your best match?
How did you score?
If you answered YES to one or more of the “A” questions, then you may be too eager to please your dates and that’s not attractive. You may be viewed as too nice or too needy. Too maternal or totally a friend.
You may spend time with men who don’t see the wonders of you, because you don’t see your own best qualities–including your natural sex appeal–that deserve appreciation and respect.
What’s the antidote to being too nice or needy?
It’s definitely not being mean or aloof in the ways you relate with men.
It’s setting healthy boundaries and creating a happy, exciting relationship with yourself first. Then you’ll naturally attract a like-minded match.
How do you create a happy, exciting relationship with yourself?
Look at each “B” question and see it as your action guide.
Make shifts in your attitudes and actions until you can answer an honest YES to all 7 “B” Questions.
This is how you bring out the best in yourself and treat yourself equally with the way you treat your best match. And this happy equality sparks excitement that lasts in a romantic relationship.
And if you’re single and seeking your best match, enjoy a free months membership in the Singles Club in Tribe Of Blondes.
Not a hair color, it’s a resilient optimism that unites us and fuels our adventures in loving fully and living our dreams now.
No more blind dates, since you meet the Tribe Of Singles in video chats and singles travel for every budget.
You don’t post your age, only a recent photo, so you can find love at any age.
And you can meet new single friends and travel companions, start new business ventures, and gain new insights and action plans for greater health, wealth, happiness and love when you belong to the Tribe of Singles.
Ready to claim your singles free month membership now?
Simply click on SINGLES CLUB in the menu bar and sign up. Enjoy!
Dedicated to your dating and relationship happiness,
Hadley Finch
Love Test – How Does The Ghost Of Fear Make Success And Love Disappear?
The ghost of fear has the power to sabotage your success, intuition, health, happiness and love. Find out why fear is a ghost and learn how to make it disappear so nothing stands in your way of loving and living your dreams now.
Why is fear a ghost?
FEAR is an acronym for False Events Appearing Real. All forms of fear and negativity are an illusion, since only love is real.
We have scientific proof that love is the highest energetic vibration, and the dominant vibration always wins.
Accept this reality and you become a ghost-buster of fear.
Deny this reality, and you give up your power to an illusive but dangerous ghost.
Why are ghosts of fear so dangerous?
They often stay hidden in your subconscious mind, so you are unaware of their harmful presence.
They are sneaky thieves who steal your focus, your enthusiasm and your dreams, because you let them stay in hiding.
How do you get rid of them?
Shed light on them. Identify which common ghost of fear is stealing your dreams. Then you can be your own ghost-buster.
In his timeless book, Think and Grow Rich, the late author Napoleon Hill, used the wisdom of Andrew Carnegie to identify six ghosts of fear in the order of their most common appearance:
The fear of poverty, the fear of criticism and the fear of ill health are the cause of most of your worries.
The fear of lost love, the fear of old age and the fear of death are three powerful ghosts that may haunt you.
All other fears are less important and can usually be grouped within these six categories.
What do these 6 basic fears have in common?
They are nothing more than states of mind and impulses of thought. Fortunately, every human being has the ability to control and direct your own mind and thoughts.
When you give up your thought control to ghosts of fear, you often give up your enthusiasm, focus, initiative, imagination, and self control.
In the clutches of fear, you cannot love fully nor form healthy friendships, so you often feel lonely and remain alone.
How do free yourself from the grasp of fear?
Know that thoughts are things. Since everything you create begins with a thought, you can create new thought habits to remain focused on love and gratitude. You can choose new outlooks and action plans to realize your dreams.
I often tell our online community, “What you see will be, with correct action.”
How do you see the brightest you and fulfill your best dreams?
This is a simple Love Test. The same way you flip a light switch to erase the darkness, you flip your thought switch to erase the ghosts of fear.
Each time you switch focus to love and gratitude, this dominant vibration wins. When you do this consistently each day for a month, it becomes a new habit that revives your enthusiasm and frees you to take daily steps to realize your dreams of success, happiness, and love.
Now you can use this secret key to success and love to improve an existing relationship.
And if you’re single and seeking to meet your best match and live your dreams now, you will meet like-minded singles during your free months trial membership in the singles club in Tribe of Blondes.
Not a hair color, it’s a resilient optimism that unites us and fuels our adventures.
No more blind dates, since you meet the savvy Tribe Of Singles in video chats and singles vacations for every budget.
You don’t post your age, only a recent photo, so you can find love at any age.
If you’re seeking upbeat single friends and travel companions, new business or social opportunities, and advice for greater health, happiness, success and love, then you’ll enjoy meeting the Tribe Of Singles.
Ready to claim your singles free membership now?
Simply click SINGLES CLUB in the menu bar and sign up. Enjoy!
Dedicated to your dating and relationship happiness,
Hadley Finch
Food Obsessions
Hellllooooo Ocean Dreamers…warning, if you are on a diet or are trying to avoid yummy foods, you just might want to ignore this post.
But…you have a girl who is currently going through PMS and craving everything there is that is remotely yummy, so food is on my mind.
My concert last night {Ingrid Michaelson} was probably the best concert I have ever been too, seriously. This red haired beauty was down to earth, lovely, and has such a great sense of humor! I highly encourage you to watch her in concert if she will be performing in your area, you don’t want to miss out! I will be posting pictures from her concert shortly, I was only 8 feet away from her!
So I have a minor food obsession and the following foods happen to be my favorite.
Let me introduce you to these fine foods…
Avocado egg rolls are my biggest obsession right now. My favorite in particular come from BJ’s, followed by Claim Jumper. Yuuuum!
Ohhh and another lovely food item that comes from my avocado addiction = guacamole! By the way, I never used to like avocados growing up. I guess this is proof that our taste buds change through the years!
One more avocado themed food item…the caterpillar roll and sushi in general. I. AM. OBSESSED. WITH. SUSHI!!!!!
Moving on to chocolate…in particular chocolate covered gummy bears. Yes, I know I might be mad but this is my favorite snack ever!
Have you ever heard of a pazookie? This has got to be the best dessert ever. It is at BJ’s and it a warm cookie with vanilla ice cream. It took me two years to have Big Kiddo try it and once he did he was so addicted!
Ferrero Rocher chocolates. Big Kiddo got me this entire box for one of my birthday presents, they are soooo good and I am not that big on chocolates.
Veggie sticks from Trader Joes. They are somewhat healthy and give me the salt kick that I desperately need on days like this. I stayed up late eating them last night, don’t tell!
Another salty snack you might ask? Well, you might try these delicious baked cheddar and sour cream chips. Which by the way I am not supposed to eat by the way. I am a lactard and am not supposed to eat dairy, oops! 
A favorite dish you can’t resist? Chicken tikka marsala. I am such a goner for Indian food.
Okay…so now that I have dished (ha ha literally) what are your favorite foods and snacks? Oh great, now I am probably going to want to try your suggestions.
Oh well…as long as I run extra miles this week, right?!
Have a yummy Monday. Don’t forget to grab yourself a snack! 
XOXO,
Love Test For Dating Singles – Is Your Date Too Good To Be True?
Ever sense that your special date is too focused on fun to settle down in a relationship? Does your date say and do everything right–except commit to a relationship?
This Love Test helps you recognize if your date just might be too good to be true to you. Then decide if this dating relationship works for you.
“Everybody plays the fool, sometimes,” sings Aaron Neville in his hit song.
There’s a big difference between feeling like a fool in love and being played as a fool in a dating relationship.
Want to make sure you aren’t fooled into thinking you could settle down with someone who’s too exciting, charming or illusive for a committed relationship? Then look for these common traits in risky dates.
In our online community, we call these magnetically attractive and emotionally risky dates, “Pioneers”, since they’re always after greener trails.
Pioneers often are recently divorced or free again after a big break up when they enter a phase of chasing pleasure in serial dating.
This phase may end if a pioneer meets someone they don’t want to lose. Then a pioneer may return to being a settler who’s content at home on the range in a happy relationship.
How do Pioneers differ from Players?
Players are often referred to as playboys or playgirls who have not yet settled down in a committed relationship and may never do so. Being a player is often a lifestyle– whereas being a pioneer is often a restless phase.
How do you know if you’re dating a pioneer or a player?
Whether it’s a phase or a lifestyle, pioneers and players share these common traits:
They chase dates with superficial appeal like physical appearance, money, career success, a fancy car or address.
Image is an aphrodisiac.
Dating is all about pursuing lust, chemistry and pleasure, since they don’t know the difference between lust and love.
They’re addicted to the rush of cupid’s cocktails that you feel at the start up of a dating relationship. If that begins to wear off, they move on to greener trails and a greater rush of pleasure.
They keep diving into a new relationship but never learn how to swim into a relationship that lasts. This is because they often cherish their freedom more than a relationship.
What are the attractor factors of players and pioneers?
They know how to have fun and plan exciting dates, so you look forward to your time together.
They may speak from the heart about past wounds or current desires for a relationship with the right person.
They may read spiritual books, do yoga, meditate or attend courses that promote personal growth.
They may say and do all the right things, so that you sense they might be ready to settle down with you.
What happens when you bring up the subject of a committed relationship?
They run. That’s when you realize you weren’t an important part of their lives.
Should you take it personally or see it as a big mistake?
I often tell my online community there are no mistakes–only choices with love lessons attached.
Always look for the love lesson.
Know that both people in a dating relationship must want and work toward a committed relationship. You can’t reach that goal alone.
Next time you meet a date who may be too good to be true, you can present this love test early in a dating relationship. Ask what they seek in a relationship.
What if they vanish into the dating pool?
What if they say all the right things about wanting a relationship but their actions don’t support their words?
You are free to move on and meet your best match who values and shares your vision for a happy relationship.
And if you’re single and seeking your best love match, I invite you to enjoy singles free months membership in the singles club in Tribe Of Blondes.
Not a hair color, it’s a resilient optimism that unites us and fuels our adventures.
No more blind dates, since you meet our savvy tribe of singles in singles chats by live video and singles travel for every budget.
We don’t post your age, so you can meet your best match at any age (21+).
Ready to claim your singles free months trial?
Simply click on SINGLES CLUB in the menu bar and sign up now. Enjoy!
Dedicated to your dating and relationship happiness,
Hadley Finch
25 Things You Never Knew About Lynsay Sands
(by Lynsay Sands)
1) I love roller coasters. I can ride them from dawn until sunset, weather permitting.
2) I love girls’ weekends with my sisters.
3) THE ROGUE HUNTER is based on one of our girls’ weekends at a cottage in Magnetawan (Canada) and I let my sisters name their characters (Jo in THE RENEGADE HUNTER and Alex in an upcoming book.)
4) My big dream is to live by the water someday.
5) My favorite Broadway show is WICKED.
6) I grew up with a mother who–God love her–thought ketchup was a main ingredient in every dish.
7) I spent most of my childhood summers on an island in Lake Erie (which was very conducive to writing.)
I lived in England for 2 years.
9) I want a dog just like Jo had in THE RENEGADE HUNTER.
10) My favorite food is potatoes in any form, which is a family trait.
11) I’ve moved six times in the last six years.
12) I can change a toilet seat.
13) The thing I missed most while in England was bologna, even though I never ate it when I lived here. Now that I’m back in Canada, I miss Scotch eggs and millionaire shortbread.
14) I’m allergic to fleas. They will leave the animal they’re on in favor of feasting on me.
15) My sisters are my best friends.
16) I get my best ideas from real life.
17) I am NOT a morning person. I am totally incoherent and completely useless until I get my hands on a cup of tea. I do my best writing at night.
18) I have completely lost my ability to cook.
19) I tend to giggle uncontrollably after two drinks.
20) I prefer bubble baths to showers.
21) I am Canadian but I hate the cold. This is a problem! My favorite seasons are spring and fall.
22) I intensely dislike bugs of any kind.
23) Won a “Shake Your Booty” contest on St. Lucia.
24) I have short arms and stubby legs.
25) I am not a vampire nor do I know any.
